NARUTO RuLZZZ!!!!!1111 (A follow up rant.)
I fit into the nicely coloured orange section of Dr Z’s rant on japan freaks. I do like manga and anime and i understand the art work and blah de blah blah blah. I indulge myself now and then and i enjoy it. However there is one thing i cannot abide and its this naruto Fandom.
For all who art familiar with naruto congratulations on your new Internet connection. Naruto is the harry potter story of ninjas the main character bieng Naruto. They go to ninja school learn ninja crap and try to be ninjas with there own super ‘awesome’ back storys *insert sarcastic smile*.
Right now my problem isnt with the story (though it has some MASSIVE fucking flaws) or the art. My porblems lie with the characters and the fans. So lets hit the actual characters first.
Naruto is a loud mouthed arogant orphan with a big nasty fox shoved painfuly up his little cunt. He has a fucking iratating catchphrase that i sharnt even diginifyby repeating… He wears a bright orange jumpsuit and his main ninja “skill” is turning into a woman.
Now thats what i call a great mixture for a ninja *insert and even more sarcastic smile*. Lets look back at just WTF is a ninja? A ninja was a spy who didnt get seen (and thus slashed to shit) and genraly snuck into places to rember something or nick sommit and then GTFO without being seen. They rarely used weapons and rarely fought because this would mean they have failed and it would be easyer to just kill themselves.
With this in mind what use is a cross dressing loud mouthed terrys chocolate orange impersonater in ye olde japan?
Well theres another shit stain right there cos we dont know if its ye olde japan or indeed japan at all. There are signs of the modern world evident and yet everyone is fucking around with big swords and petty knives. It would be a nice relief to see Kazuo Kiriyama (YEAH FUCKING BATTLE ROYALEREFERENCE BITCH) tear into the protagonists with a m10 and grenade launcher.
Next character on my shit list is sasuke. I really wana just say “see emorants” and go into my kitchen and get some ice cream but that would be seriously neglecting my duty as a manga and anime fan to verbaly rape this massive cum soaked boob of a cliche. Sasuke is the most popular character in naruto because apparently 9-13 years olds havnt seen this samey shit cliche EVERYWHERE. My god he is silent…ooo he must be thinking…wow mysterious. In actualy fact its more likley that sasuke is contiplating how many times he can turn down easy sex with the pink haired bitch because he is secreatly gay. BUT STOP THE FUCK RIGHT THERE!! I have inivertable stepped onto Sasuke biggest fan group of all. The Yaoi FREAKS. And yes you are freaks!
For you who arnt aware Yaoi means gay hentai. And if your not sure what hentai is get your parents round go on google image search unfiltered and type in “hentai” *insert sarcastic thuumbs up*.
Sasuke seems to really enjoy and exploit Rule 34 (which btw i wont be explaining because if u dont know what rule 34 is you can fucking google it like the rest of us) to the extent that jack the ripper would shed a tear.
Pink haired bitch doesnt do anything.
Right am bored of chattin bout the plot holes and boring shit so lets flame the REAL cunts. The fans.
Again i understand that alot of naruto fans are nice normal people who eat cheese like everyone else. But its the die hards and the liberlings that make me wana take a broken DVD to my face.
so heres a round up of some types of naruto fans.
- FORUM HUMPPER: These are the fans that are on EVERY forum and will defend naruto till there fingers bleed from typing badly. often found to be saying things such as “STFU nuuub!!!11 u sux NARUTO fucking rullezzzzzzzzzzz yeah? and ur just a faggot cos ur fucking gay and FUCK YOU!!!!!!111oneoneone”
- The hardcore: These put up more of a fight when it comes ot naruto. They hit you with every possable good thing about naruto and every possable fact and info. They quote lines like some crazy religeous mantra and praise Naruto and all its shitty spin offs like some unholy god.
- The liberling: Admitably this type is the ost sypathisable group there just too fucking stupid anf young to know otherwise. They missed out on akira and ninja scroll and thus have nothing to capare this shit to except for pokemon whitchis now “uncool”.
All the above can and should be classed as “Narutards”
My point is this (cause am getting fucking hungry for this ice cream) when a fan base this massive can’t even descide on how the title of the fucking show is pronounced then its only going to head the same way as christianity which is never NEVER good. Especialy if your into yaoi…
.akco.
p.s fuck you.
